I remember the day, shame took me over.In an instant, I could not trust myself. I was afraid to feel my feelings. I was afraid to think. Inside me was a boxer punching my head at every thought and ever feeling, telling me that I was different and alone.
That shame controlled me and I didn’t know it. I hid from myself. I could not face my thoughts or my feelings. I felt as if they were electric, saying bad, bad, bad.
I keep leaving this article because I don’t want to do it. However, I sense that I should because I am not alone and maybe I can say what many people are feeling, not just me.
I don’t know how I came to get in such a hole. The hole was the feeling that I was bad, just so bad that I had to hide. I used to belong to the human race and then, one day, I belonged to no one, most especially myself.
I will be back