Is your Chiron wound like nuclear pain? I know that people try to put on a positive face in this plastic society but I am going to take my mask off, not that I have it on that much. I try not to anyway. It is very hard to let your insides show without a lot of confidence. I don’t have that much but I guess this was all a leading up to my talking about my Chiron. The more I do charts, the more I can see the Chiron wound playing out. Each person has his Chiron in a different house. However, that house seems to be a wellspring of pain. I used to think I was alone in this huge pustule of pain I carried. The location of the pain varies from person to person. However,the nuclear size of the wound seems to be the same. Truth is in very short shrift in this culture. No one seems to share their pain except with a counselor , astrologer or in other such private settings. Why bother consulting someone if you are going to keep your mask on? This is what sparks this article. Please comment on my Comment Form. I value your input a great deal!
The title of the article is My Chiron Wound. Many of you know mine as I talk about it quite a bit. I have Pholus( the asteroid of explosion) conjunct Chiron( the planet of pain) That is my excuse 😀 However, I don’t just talk about it for myself. I have Moon in cancer conjunct the MC. I was created to show my heart to others. The chart shows why you were made. We all were made for a purpose. We each have a gift that no one in the entire universe can duplicate. You just have to find it. I have a Grand Trine of Chiron, Venus and the ASC. It is stronger because my Venus in Unaspected, meaning that no other planets touch it. An Unaspected planet forces you to go on a singular journey to learn to express the nature of the planet. With Venus, it is love. With Pluto, it is power. With Uranus, it is uniqueness. The Unaspected planet is like buried treasure. You may leave it buried or dig it up. If you dig it up, you are uniquely gifted in the domain of that planet. My purpose is to use love and share my pain. The ASC is your walk in the world.
My Chiron is in the 4th house, the house of the mother. My 4th house is Aquarius which is a cold sign. My early home was very cold. My mother is an Aquarius sun combust Aquarius Mercury. This combination is an EXACT conjunction with my Chiron in the 4th House. How could that happen? It must have been God’s plan. I don’t know if you have done this but I have raised my hand to the sky hundreds of times and asked why did I have to have my mother. I wished she died after I was born. I still do. Does this make me bad? Probably. At any rate, I have not had one moment in my sentient life when I have not hurt because of her. I know this because I had an OBE( out of body experience) It was my best one. I was flying over a beautiful body of water and people were sailing and sail boarding. It was amazingly peaceful and wonderful. I kept saying, “I don’t hurt anymore from my mother” I kept repeating it because I have never had a moment in my life when I have not hurt from this. I may have been doing wonderful things, but the pain was always there. This got me to thinking about the Chiron wound and hoping that some of my precious and beloved readers would share about theirs.
Ami, im sorry!! Your such an amazing person, have you ever had someone really tell you how amazing you are? I mean sit down and spell it out for you? Then help you see how you see yourself isnt through your eyes, you still see yourself through your moms eyes.
Thats why you hurt so much, you adopted her vantage point of you and you never developed your own thoughts on who you are and were.
Shes still in your head so no matter where she physically is, you carry her around with you. When someone compliments you, her judgement is what you hear…her judgement telling you that what they say isnt true…only what she says about you is true.
The problem is your still listening to her! I know cancer loves their mom, or hates them…and theres nothing in between. The bond is tight, and you have a lot of cancer….so its hard to not base life on her thoughts on who you are….the best way to counteract her words, is to monitor your thoughts so you can learn how to accept a compliment into your heart.
You must, and i mean MUST….push her out of your head every time you hear her and say NO! That is not what i think of myself, and follow it up by telling yourself what you do think of yourself….
Your going to have to balance out her negativity with your positive thoughts until you believe them…..that takes time and a lot of thought monitoring…you need to start deciphering your thoughts from her thoughts, so you can start to get to know yourself without her opinions!
Ive had to do this myself and its not easy, but it works….it will take years to truly get her out of your head but everyday and every thought that you are able to overwrite hers and put in yours is one thought closer to being able to live in peace inside yourself.
Love you Ami! 🙂
Aww You made me cry, Gabby. Thank you. Love you!
I cant wait for the day your general feeling of just being is simple, uncomplicated! I can’t wait to hear you say, today i caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and i realized i was smiling….i guess im starting to feel happy even when im not thinking and forcing it. Wow!!
I cant wait Ami!! 🙂
Thank you Gabby dear <3
My chiron is in my 11th house Taurus conjunct Hekate and combust Sedna! Ugh!! This is not good!!! Thoughts/interpretations?
You don’t want to look at your pain because it holds parts of you you don’t want to face, in my opinion. Betrayal by men is prolly a large part of it <3
Thank you for sharing, Ami. *Namaste*
Your Cancer Moon conjunct MC also you will nurture/mother people. And in doing so, nurture yourself. For some reason I am curious as to where Ceres is on your chart. Cancer moon = Karma attached to the mother. Best of luck. And Strength.
*Bless*
Thank you Elise dear. I will look for Ceres. Come and post your chart on my Forum!
Hi Ami,
I have to commend you on your honesty regarding your feelings about your mother. I too do not like my mom, and it is finally coming to a point where it is in my face and have to be true to my feelings. I can’t imagine what you went through with your mother, but with mine she has verbally berated me since I was very young. I think that the most hurtful thing that she has ever said to me was that nobody wanted me. I am with her now, as she is 85, and has no mobility. I hope to get away from her soon, and am trying to forgive her, but can’t yet. My astrology chart shows this, as nemesis is conjunct the moon. I am also trying to forgive myself for my feelings about her, as this is not something that a lot of people can identify with. I dont’t know the details of the relationship with your mother, but I do understand where the feelings come from. I believe that abuse from a parent is the ultimate betrayal. And my mom still doesn’t see it. I don’t think this is due to my chiron in pisces in the 6th house, I just felt the need to relate. I am a cancer sun BTW.
You know? I think I have Nemesis conj the Moon, too. Yes, it is super, super hard. I am sorry, Lesley, dear. Do you want to put her chart up and we can take a look.
Hi Ami, I would love to put up her chart, I have tried to put up my own and am still trying to figure it out. I will keep trying. I do know that her moon is in aquarius.
I just started another professional chart so I will be occupied for about a week anyway.