This is a purely amazing subject.I am talking from my own personal experience, as well as the many charts I have done. Chiron is a weird-o. If I see Chiron coming in synastry, I hold my breath. Chiron will usually follow the same path, such that I know what he is up to, by now. I will try to explain what I have observed with Chiron in synastry. Please, add any comments yea or nay, as always. The planet person,usually, comes to the Chiron person for healing. The myth of Chiron is that of the wounded healer. Chiron can heal others from his wound, but he can never heal, himself. It is a sad story, as are most of the myths. However, the myths ring true . That is why they are so poignant.
In one chart, the mother’s Aqua Sun and mercury were an exact conjunction with the daughters Chiron. True to the myth, the mother wanted the daughter to parent her, guide her, and heal her. The daughter was a child and unable . The mother was very angry, as she thought it was her due, from being a mother. The relationship between mother and daughter was very hard. Ultimately, as happens with most Chiron relationships, it was too painful and broke apart to nothingness.
In another relationship between two girlfriends, they got close very fast, as is the case with Chiron. They felt they had found their best friend. It was wonderfully close, for as long as it lasted. There was an unusual depth and connection. There seems to be a loyalty,too. While the Chiron relationship lasts, it can be very positive. It can fill a void for each person. It can provide an intense connection which acts for the good of both people. In other words, it can be very positive while it lasts. However, when it breaks apart, that can be expected. When that happens, one must celebrate what was and let the person go. In the latter, it was an exact Venus/ Chiron conjunction in synastry.
Another example is a platonic male/female relationship. His mars was conjunct her Chiron. Again, they got very close, very fast. It was wonderfully healing, for as long as it lasted. Then, there was a small misunderstanding and it split apart, as fast as it had come together.
The strangest one was between two girlfriends.One girl’s Nessus was conjunct the other’s Chiron. The strangeness of the aspect, exactly, mirrored the strangeness of the relationship, from beginning to end. They started off as close friends. Then, they became bitter enemies. Then, they became very close, in the best friends way that is classic with Chiron. Then, the split apart over a small misunderstanding which was impossible to resolve, even though it should have been easy. The Nessus/ Chiron one was the strangest in that the Chiron person dropped off the face of the earth to the Nessus person, who had been her closest friend, just before. However, due to the intensity of each planet/ asteroid, one would expect such a bizarre course of events.
I will mention the North Node and Chiron, here., even though I talked about it in a separate article.This one must be stated, as Chiron will become the theme of the relationship. If a married couple has one person’s Chiron conjunct another’s North Node, there will be a pain theme in the relationship. Chiron, by nature, cannot heal. As such, there will be an open wound as the core of the relationship. This is very sad.
I have guidelines for any Chiron relationships. One must give a lot of space to each other, if the relationship is to last. Can it last? I don’t know . I know that NN/ Chiron can last, but one will be well versed in pain, as a result.
A wonderful Astrologer, Ceridwen, , just added this. It was too marvelous, not to share.
Yes, Chiron is strange.
But in a strange way it is also deep soulstuff, I find that it renders someone completely vulnerable. As if you had shed every protective skin, and you can only hope the other one will not hurt you so much, that it might destroy you. Sort of like your core lies totally open, and you don`t have any kind of defenses.
Thank you, Ceri!
Hello again – Here’s another subject close to my heart, seeing as how my husband and I share several exact Chiron conjunctions (none to our Nodes). I relate to what both you and Ceridwen shared – that with our vulnerabilities exposed there’s bound to be a certain amount of pain, but also the *potential* for a great deal of healing . . . *if* we’re willing to patiently work through our defensive layers and not give in to the human temptation to use the weaknesses of the other as weapons against them. Or to reject them because their woundedness reminds us of our own human frailty. I think what often happens is that after the initial attraction wears off, we realize these aren’t light-weight contacts. Plus, no one person can be solely responsible for healing another; we have to be willing participants in our own personal evolution.
Chiron doesn’t always like to be touched, let alone acknowledge its vulnerability – maybe that explains why some of these relationships end suddenly (or too much Uranus, not enough Saturn?). Not everyone resonates with what Chiron is trying to teach us; denial can be a very powerful and effective defense mechanism which stops us from revealing and accepting our own soft underbelly. For those of us who do resonate, sometimes our Chiron-Return brings greater clarity and acceptance.
After almost 25 years together, my husband and I may not have found a *cure*, but we have found healing. Maybe it helps that we both share similar generational natal aspects to our Chiron placements, which are both in Aquarius, the sign of the outcast.
As an aside, I’ve noticed that the natal planet person often acts as a catalyst for facilitating the healing the natal Chiron person unconsciously seeks. Then the healing relationship becomes mutual since in showing compassion for the “Other”, the wound of the Chiron person is transformed. And sometimes, once the goal is accomplished, the relationship ends – if that was its sole purpose.
Please feel free to leave this comment unposted, Ami; I think my comment may be longer than your post – yikes! I really only wanted to share all this since you said you enjoyed talking astrology. Me too. Especially when the discussion helps to encourage spiritual growth and integrity.
It is NOT too long, LB. I encourage discussion on my website. It is my outreach to anyone who finds value in it, from any standpoint.. Thank you for your comments. Please, continue to talk about anything that sparks your interest. Chiron can be a healer, for sure. I am glad you found healing with your husband. That is what it is all about!
What a gorgeous article and thoughtful and healing reply. And it’s amazing for us to hear that Chiron contacts can stay together. Thank you!
Thank you, Anna dear. Yes, one makes the choice what one will do with the chart. The chart outlines the skeleton of the relationship. One chooses one’s usage of the chart! xx
Mmmm, what about my Chiron in partner’s 7th house (in synastry). Could I be brining him healing in some way…. (my chiron is in Taurus )
Well Jenny, I think to look at more detail than just a House placement. I am glad you are reading and asking questions. Keep em coming 🙂
I have Chiron in Aries conjunct a guys Sun, Mercury and Mars
His Chiron In Taurus is conjnct my South Node.
How will this play out? I hope someone can answer this because i feel i have some strange connection to him but still not sure what it is? Thanks.
Hi Glittergirl
Your Chiron conjunct his Sun, merc and mars and his Chiron conj your SN. This is my opinion and others may differ but I will tell you mine, straight out. You may get really close, really fast. Then, some small disagreement could happen and you will break apart as fast as you got close. You will not be able to get close again, no matter how hard you try. This is my opinion and my experience. However, I may be wrong xx
I have many articles on Chiron in synastry. Take a look and tell me what you think 😀
Hi Amiann, thanks for the reply! You are right about one thing me and this guy are not close at all now. Infact i can’t even call it a friendship because it just feels really shallow now. Basically i haven’t gone along with how this guy wanted to play me so now he’s punishing me by not talking to me properly, its just really shallow now even though i thought there was an connection there at the start. I am the chiron person but i feel he is the one who does not want to engage in a conversation with me because he can’t manipulate me the way he wants to.
You are welcome, Glittergirl. Come and sign up on my Forum, if you would like. It is free and I, and other lovers of Astrology, can kick around things. Come and put your chart in my Personal Readings section! xx
Hi Everyone! just wanted to share my story. Im no expert when it comes to astrology but I find it very intriguing. My 11th house sun (also my chart ruler) 19Gemini50 is nearly exact conjunct my boyfriends 9th house chiron at 19Gemini40. We met in March of 1999, and we bonded almost immediately. When I saw him I just knew he was mine! But there was a big problem. He was a heroin addict and had been for nearly 5 years! When I found out it was devastating to me. It was as if my soul recognized him and was traumatized by the pain he was in, and at a complete loss as to what to do. Now I know you’ve been saying that the planet person is looking to be healed, but I think it was the reverse in our circumstances. Its been a long hard road, and our relationship is rocky at the moment (though we do have a composite moon trine saturn, so we”ll see what happens) but he is currently a little over 2 years sober which is a feat for opiate addicts since there is such a large relapse rate. Sometimes I jokingly say that the day he met me was the luckiest day of his life, but I truly believe if we had never met that he’s still be using or dead.
WOW Keepingfaith
Chiron can be a glue but with a great deal of pain. Consider coming on my Forum where you can put up your charts and we will look at them and discuss them. I am so glad for yours and his great progress. That is beautiful and may God bless and keep you both. Hope to see you on my Forum, dear one!
Oh also, my pluto conjunct his ascendant in his first house probably also played a big part!
Yes, that is super powerful. YOU were the source of transformation for him. That is exactly what Pluto does lol
Hello. any words in jupiter conjuct chiron in synastry? Thanks
Interesting about that one. I have not seen it, but I would have to think about how to speculate on it. Why don’t you tell me about it, so I can learn 😀
hi amiann thanks for the posts on chiron synastry.
i have a relationship synastry where both chirons and males venus on females ascendant conjunct- all opposite male pluto.
how do you think this could play out?…..:-)
Can you list these aspects as I am having a hard tome following what you mean. Come and join my Forum and you can post the charts!
Thank you for your kind comments, too!
hi amiann thanks for the chiron post!!
i have a relationship synastry where both chirons conjunct eachother conjunct male venus conjunct female ascendant opposite male pluto…….
……..how do you think this will play out?
🙂
Hmm, if you were born close in time, the Chirons will conjunct and it won’t be a big deal. However, when you get personal planets like Venus and personal angles like the ASC, it will. I can’t quite get the whole picture from words. You can come and put up your chart, in my Forum. However, just some thoughts. Chiron conj Venus will bring pain with love. This is not good for long term. For short term, it will be super intense and passionate. You will feel like you found your best friend but these relationships seem to start and end suddenly and never seem to get back, once they end. Chiron conj the ASC would be super bad, basically. The Chiron person brings pain to one of the most sensitive places of the ASC person. The ASC person will feel this plain in a very, personal, close and present way. I would not think this relationship would last imho
Great article! Could you clarify who usually ends the relationship, the planet person or the chiron person. Also, what if the synastry only has flowing aspects to the planet in this conjunction to the chiron? I’m also curious to know what you may have observed when chiron is aspected in other ways in a synastry. Have you come across any charts with mutual aspects (not necessarily conjunctions) to each other’s chirons when the chirons weren’t conjunct? Please share any additional observations you may have had since you wrote this article. Thanks!
Thanks Jkitty
It is funny that you mention other aspects to Chiron in synastry because I feel compelled to watchc for this( before you mentioned it) It hit me that I don’t watch for Chiron aspects in synastry and I need to. I, also, need to pay more attention to Chiron aspects in the natal. Astro.com does not put aspect lines for Chiron unless you request it, so I overlooked it.
Who leaves first–the Chiron or planet person?
Chiron relationships seem to implode in a strange way. They seem to get really, really close fast. Then, they break up over some little nothing. It seems that you cannot repair them. This has been my experience, both personal and from seeing other people via charts. Chiron conjunct the NN seems different though. That can stay for the life of a marriage, for example. The NN aspects in synastry define the relationship. However, they do not seem to break up the relationship. Why? I don’t know. They seem like almost an ambient guidepost, as if they function at a different level than more “active” aspects. I don’t know if this makes sense. I think the NN is a quite different point than planetary aspects.
Thanks for your prompt reply. I had an interesting thought this morning about Chiron being the “wounded healer” and associated this with Jesus Christ, the ultimate “wounded healer”. Maybe that’s just because Chiron in Pisces in my chart makes it’s strongest connections trine my 9th house Mars and conjunct my 5th house Mercury. I don’t like to take a fatalistic view in astrology and believe we still have a tremendous amount of choice within the parameters of our chart on how we use those energies. If I take my Chiron wound to Jesus, He CAN heal it in me and I can still bring healing to others without being stuck in perpetual pain.
Having Chiron in my 5th house has been very interesting in itself. I’m definately a creative person with much interest and involvement in the arts and training in ballet and voice. The “wound” for me is a sense of inadequacy because I’ve got the “wrong” body type to be a professional ballet dancer and a substantial amount of hearing loss which makes me feel insecure vocally, though I’ve sung on stage as well. It took people ASKING me to perform solos (dance or singing) in their stage productions to get me performing in public. I cherish the “helpers alongside” that God brought into my life since I became a Christian many years ago. Interestingly, the people who invite me to perform are also Christians, though most of the performances have been for secular audiences. So here is one example of how a 5th house Chiron can work.
If I take my Chiron wound to Jesus, He CAN heal it in me and I can still bring healing to others without being stuck in perpetual pain.
Totally!
Having Chiron in my 5th house has been very interesting in itself. I
Yes, you may! You might also be interested to know that I’m still in contact with these people who have been my “helpers alongside” for about 10 years now, so maybe not all Chiron contacts end up breaking up if the energy is used right. Admittedly, the contacts are sporatic and unpredictable, but the relationships are by no means ended.
Interesting about the Chiron contacts. Maybe, the breakups are for romantic relationships and super close friendships. That has been my personal experience, anyway. Come and join my Forum and you can out up your chart!
I had several (short-lived and karmic) relationships in the past with Chiron aspects, never conjunction. I didnt pay attention to Chiron then. Some years ago I had a platonic relationship (my Aries Chiron conjuncted his Aries Venus) and then I noticed the magic of Chiron-Venus contacts. We talked maybe once in 3 months, but he always looked back when we said good bye.
Last year something developed really fast with a man I have Chiron-Venus DW with (my Aries Chiron conjuncts his Aries Venus and his Aqua Chiron squares my Scorpio Venus). My Chiron makes good aspects to his others planets, too. We have Chiron-Saturn square DW as well. His Aqua Chiron sits exactly (0 degree) on my Aqua NN. My Aries Chiron conjuncts (more widely) his SN-Venus conjunction. Im intrigued by Chiron/NN/SN.
We got close fast, he opened up to me and we shared emotional intimacy. Then started the pain. It feels like we cant be in each other’s presence, it is too painful. We seem to hit innocently each other’s soft spots. He started avoiding me, I brought it up, he denied the whole connection… he shut down, fortunately not completely. Ego battles… I promised myself to keep my ego in watch at his presence, but it feels like he shoots me down and I have to defend myself like a wounded animal.
It s definitely a soul challenge and an ego lesson. The feeling of love is overwhelming with Chiron/Venus. And we are drawn to each other in spite of the pain. He always comes back.
Wow Great comment. So, does your Venus/Chiron always come back? That has not been my personal experience. For me, once it breaks, it is gone.
Yes, first i saw him every 6 weeks, now the intervals have been shorter. He comes back to connect. With him I dont feel the separation pain so much like in previous (karmic) rel.ships, maybe because I feel that he will be in my life (a long time). We share a Saturn-Sun DW (conjunction and sextile). Lots of DWs. It feels like a mirror spirit rel.ship.
He must come back due to the Saturn. Without this, the Chiron relationships seem to end for good, in my experience.
Hello AmiAnn,
I’ve been studying Chiron and came across this post. My SO’s Chiron is bi-quintile my Venus. My Venus is in the 1st house in Leo, his Chiron is Aries in the 1st house. Also, my 9th house Chiron in Aries is bi-quintile his 9th house Jupiter in Scorpio. Can you help me understand what this means?
Also, I have another friend whose 11th house Chiron in Taurus is quintile my 12th house SN in Cancer? Does this mean one day we’ll get mad at each other and eventually stomp off or that pain will be a recurring theme in our interaction?
Thanks!!
I will look tomorrow, Ronni dear. You name reminds me of a traditional Jewish song and dance.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Etnen1loIho